Tuesday 30 September 2008

its raining weirdos!!

I woke up with a start this morning and had an epiphany!
*berry to self*- U have to start blogging more regularly and you need to start finishing gist in ONE post!!

self- but its their fault..nobody reads the blog anymore..y should i care!

berry- maybe they r tired of coming to the page and seeing your one month old post..it gets annoying!

*sigh*

*long post alert*

So..hey!! Wow..all of a sudden..even if this 'dating' was an internal decision..it appears that someone took out an ad for me in some national newspaper because woah!..ive been meeting the weirdest people.

Ok..some of the weird people have nothing to do with dating self

bit of background info- when uni started..i took this job..working with international students during freshers week..u know..picking them from the airport and sorting them out during the week..all that sorta stuff!

1. So this was one of the days when i went to heathrow to pick up some students. I'm at work so obviously..my accent is totally different (as in really..only nigerians understand naija accent)..so im organising people into coaches and stuff and this guy just goes like..

guy- U look nigerian
me- i am

*guy bursts into laughter*

guy- oyiiiinbo!

me thinking 'WTF' ????

ME- pardon
guy- what did you just say..u said perdon..y are u sounding like that

*i stare at him blankly*

2. So im working inside uni this day..im at the door of the marquee..holding a clicker which is basically just to count the number of people that come into the marquee..this guy comes over (it doesnt help that i have a huge name tag with my nigerian name on it)..

guy- hello
me- *smiling* hiii
guy- so you are a nigerian
me- yeah *still smiling*
guy- so u were born here abi?
me- um..no.
guy- you can tell from my accent that i just came abi??

now let me just mention here that i have nothing against meeting nigerians..i just dont like
(a) the familiarity- were not automatic friends because were from the same country
(b) judging me- im sorry if i dont sound nigerian enough for you..it happens ok? get over it! and im at work..when im with my friends..i can be wateva i want to be..but at work..i neeed to let people understand me!!!

3. So im at home on my day off. My flatmate comes back laughing and excited..

flatmate- can u imagine what happened at work today?? this guy comes over to me and asks if i remember him..im looking at him blankly..then he says..oh its not u..im looking for the girl that was holding that clicking thing..i dressed up for her

*apparently he was wearing a suit!!*

so basically he asked quite a few people for me and everybody had a laugh about it..what the hell??

4. I'm at the marquee..this guy comes over..he's cute sha..

guy- im technically not an international student..because ive been here for a while..but i just thought i'd see what was happening here
me- where are u from
guy- ghana
me- some happy speech that im supposed to give..about how we can help and stuff
guy hangs around and makes conversation till i volunteer to go and work somewhere else.

later in the day guy comes back to look for me. hangs around till i finish work. walks with me part of the way home. we swap numbers. comes to look for me the next day..etc

third day- tells me how hes attracted to me (physically purely) and bla bla bla..riiite...(although i wont lie to u..for him to feel attracted to me in that horrible uniform!!!)

5. Remember bulgy muscle guy that i was telling you about in the last post?? kai! that guy has a way of making me RUUUUUUUUUN!!

guy- u have a great body..i have a great body..were going to make some beautiful babies

um...WTF??? how is it that great bodies= beautiful babies???

guy- berry, i want to be your boyfriend, i want you to be my girlfriend, i want you to be part of my family, i want you to meet my family, i want us to build our careeres together, i want us to buy a house together......

me - *starting blankly at my phone and wondering what ive done to deserve this*

what even made the speech crazier was that he was actually at a hse party and he went to his car to call me! i hoope he was drunk!! i really do!!

ok..thats all i can do today mehn!..ill dedicate my next post to the 'other guy' i mentioned at the end of my last post!!

xx

15 comments:

Buttercup said...

1ssssssssssssssssssst!

Buttercup said...

yay! u r gonna become a regular now!!! lol @ the convo with self..

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! this was really funny! sp the last dude..i mean, what the hell is this: "guy- u have a great body..i have a great body..were going to make some beautiful babies" ???

oh yea, im still waitin for the gist bout the other guy o!

omonaija123 said...

wait am confused....is the Ghanaian guy the drunk guy ?

Confessions of a London gal said...

Damn!I am never gonna be 1st, am i? Oh well!
I dont know who is worse in Nigerians and Ghanaians u know? Only difference is Nigerians annoy you from the beginning, Ghanaians annoyance are more delayed! lol....but what can we do?- we have to manage them like that now, abi?

Anonymous said...

na wa o...ONLY YOU???! ur balling o!

Black Berry said...

i need to become a better writer..at lest one person is always confused from my posts..omonaija..ghanian guy is diff from drunk guy..drunk guy is bulgy muscle guy from my last post!

LG said...

lollllllllllllllllllll@..u have a great body..i have a great body..were going to make some beautiful babies
'mentacrase'

Enigma said...

I feel the 'Nigerian' angle...especially the 'local' ones who want to 'feel' somehow..

Went with a friend to his uni last week and some guy stopped me asking if i had a brother in london and how long i've been in the country..i looked at him like..err, you dont KNOW me!!

All the best with the guys!

Justme said...

lol! nice blog by the way...very real..down to earth

Nice guy said...

yea the automatic familiarity upon finding out someone is Nigerian is getting old..especially in places like jand where nigerians r almost more than white people sef

Naija Idol said...

HMMM. ur life is quite interesting.

H8 dat "im from naija, u r from naija, we r friends" sh*t. seriously. yea. we can have a conversation but it doesnt mean itll lead to something.

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

lol im sure they mean no harm, everybody does the over familiarity thing even the english when they meet abroad, my friend who is from America complains about americans he meets in Scotland. I guess sometimes when you meet somone from the same country town city etc as you in a place far away from where you both come from youfeel as though you have met a relative.....but i personnaly hate it when people come upto me.

Anonymous said...

LOL!!
Pele o...its not easy being a hot girl!

xx

Anonymous said...

Wow all I can say is that you are a great writer! Where can I contact you if I want to hire you?

Anonymous said...

top [url=http://www.c-online-casino.co.uk/]uk online casino[/url] hinder the latest [url=http://www.realcazinoz.com/]casino bonus[/url] free no deposit hand-out at the foremost [url=http://www.baywatchcasino.com/]no put gratuity
[/url].